Make That Date

Look at a scenario concerning dating;

You look across the room and there he or she is. This person has a warm smile, pretty face and looks great physically. Your mind begins to consider what your eyes are looking at and you smile back. You like what you see. Then you move on and open your mouth. A brief conversation occurs (you both giggle a bit, smile a lot) and you find yourself asking if this person would like to meet you for coffee or breakfast to just talk. They say yes.

You just made a date!

What is the definition for dating? What does it mean? Different people have different meanings for what it means to them. Here is a general definition;

Dating. The practice of going out with someone to have company and companionship with, oftentimes with the goal of seeking a permanent lifetime partner.

Dating has been around for centuries. People have used dating as the main way to meet someone of the opposite sex. It keeps your options open and is a good way to find people who are compatible with you.

Here are some reasons people look for someone to be with:

1) Friendship date - someone who you know and are comfortable in their presence. You call them up to just hang out, maybe no real agenda.
2) Eye Candy - this is the person you ask to go out with you when you want to be seen with someone stunning on your arms.
3) Sex Partner - this is the person that you find is good in bed. People who arrange for these types of dates typically only want one thing. Once that has been satisfied the partner can go on their own way.
4) Dance Partner - this person is the one you go out with to party. They love to dance and do the whole party scene so you can go out on a "night on the town"
5) Fun Partner - this person you call up when you are just lonely or need some company. You may have no special place to be and not want sex, just company.
6) Finding a life partner - We call this "dating to mate" where you are looking for that marriage material date.

The only way you can get to know someone is to go out with them, spend time with them and get to know them better. People tend to be on their best behavior when you first meet. It is only after spending time with them do you get to see who they really are. You can go and have some fun.

This article is an excerpt from my new book "Do You Want to Date or Mate" available on Amazon. For more info visit my website.

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Why Lie?

Lying--we all do it at one time or another and for reasons as varied as there are stars in the sky. Social media is full of liars, we all know those 'friends' who, if you didn't know the truth and actually believed in all that was posted you would think had the coolest life around. The reality of course is that the person is trying so hard at making us all believe it is all sunshine and lollypops that the truth becomes faded, distorted and forgettable. Fact is, you can't get away from the truth, it always wins out, this is true in life, in social media and most importantly on dating sites.

Whether you are on one of the popular dating sites, specialized ones like those for Christians or the differently abled or simply trying to meet Mr. or Ms. Right in chat rooms, lies are rampant. People lie about what they look like, their weight, their dreams, their social conscience, their religions, their beliefs, and what they are looking for in a mate. The question is, why? Relationships built on a bed of lies are destined for failure. How can you expect to be matched with the person who is 'just right' for you if you aren't giving them the real truth about who you are?

Being honest with yourself and your potential mate is such a great way to start any relationship. If you have a disability, be up front about it right away, if people shy away from contacting you based on that disability, they weren't the right one for you, so why would you waste your time when you could be finding that one who is? If you are lying about what you look like and go so far as to post a picture of someone else instead of yourself, what message is that sending to prospective friends? If you meet, the other person is instantly disappointed you lied and weren't as you seemed. Case closed.

People join dating sites all the time and with varied results. Not everyone has the happy ending they depict on the commercials, but you can go a long way in making yourself one of the lucky ones if you are honest and up front from the beginning. If you are all you have to hope is the one you have your eye on is equally as honest and it could be the start of a beautiful new adventure for both of you.

Soulful encounters is a safe and welcoming dating site for the differently abled and disabled in the community. Whether you are looking for friends or something more they can help you find what you are looking for. For more information, please visit their website at http://www.soulfulencounters.com

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Simple Tips To Make Your HIV Dating More Comfortable

Living with HIV calls for strength and positivity. Only the strong hearted are able to accept their status and work towards starting all over again facing the daily challenges that come with being HIV positive. After the acceptance phase, it is natural that you might have the urge to plunge back into the dating world for a fulfilling flirt, date or true love. At the end of the day you are human and it is okay to yearn for love. Luckily, you no longer have to stress too much about your status and finding a date or a soul mate that understands and accepts you. This is all thanks to
HIV dating sites that are dedicated to singles suffering from HIV.

The sites bring together HIV positive singles from all parts of the world for dates, hookups, flirts and love. Some have actually found soul mates through the sites and it's never too late for you. In such a dating environment, you will feel accepted and you won't have to put up with discrimination and stigma when seeking love. You will however need to be strategic to make the dating work for you. It is important to get it right from the initial online dating to any physical dates that you might have in the future.

Be honest when creating your profile. This will ensure that you end up attracting positive singles sharing the same interests as you do. At the end of the day, compatibility is important and this can be hard to achieve when you lie too much about who you really are. Try and be yourself from the word go.

Be fun to be chat with. Online relationships can be challenging at first because you are never too sure about the emotions the other person is going through. Facial expressions and body language easily guide offline dating but this is a luxury you don't have when dating online. It is therefore very important to remain fun without exaggerating. This will make your date comfortable enough to be around you and you will find the conversations flowing easily.

Avoid asking too many questions. Yes, you are dating positive singles, but you don't want to go crashing on their privacy. Even though you share a common status, not everyone is interested to open up and talk about the situation at first. Unless your date decides to share those inner secrets about their secrets, avoid pushing too much. For instance, it is not important to ask how they contracted the virus or you will come off as insensitive. Try and leave the conversation as natural as possible.

Be a listener. The truth is that different HIV positive singles handle their situations differently. Some are yet to fully accept and sometimes all they need is a shoulder to lean on. On discovering that your date falls under this group, be the best listener, he or she expects you to be. It could be very therapeutic to them and you could actually be the beginning of a new hope for them.

Dating positive singles has been made simpler by HIV dating sites. You however, should try and make the experience easy for you and for your dates as much as you can.

HIV positive and single? Join http://www.HIVdating4u.com - The Place For HIV Positive Singles - and find a date. Positive Singles no longer need to hide and live in isolation.

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6 Best Places to Meet Your Mr Right

1. Friends and Family. Friends and family love to play matchmaker. They are a great resource, they know you, what you like and hopefully your type On your journey to attracting Mr. Right I think that it is a great idea to let your friends and family know that you're looking to date. They probably know someone who is a good fit for you.

2. Single Social Clubs. Joining a singles social club is a great way to connect with other singles to meet and greet. Many single social clubs do activities together that are fun and entertaining.

3. Speed Dating. Speed dating is great because there is are many single men gathered in one place and you have the opportunity to spend between 2-5 minutes speaking with each one of them. This is great if you're shy because it takes the awkwardness out of approaching a total stranger. Don't be afraid to try it.

4. Single Cruises. Why not find love at sea? This is a great opportunity for you to vacation and find the love of your life.

5. Meetup.com. Meetup.com is a great resource for meeting single men and connecting with single groups. They have about every type of single group whether it's speed dating, single wine tasting, and much more. I would highly recommend that you join a singles group that also includes your hobby.

6. Single's Dinner Party. Do you love to eat and meet new people? There are some Single's dinner party groups that you can join or you can host your own. If you have a group of friends who are single then host your own dinner party and ask everyone to invite their single friends. (Rule of thumb: make sure that there is an equal amount of men and women.)

Mr. Right Attraction Assignment

1. Make dating a priority. In order to meet Mr. Right you must make yourself available to meet him.

2. Contact your friends and family and let them know that you're looking to date and if they know of anyone that would be a great fit. Please also inform your family and friends of what type of man you're looking for. (They may set you up on a blind date with Mr. Wrong.)

3. Pick 2 places from the list above and make it a habit to join, meet, and mingle.

Have fun dating and attracting Mr. Right!

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Disadvantages of Dating Older Man

Dating or marrying an older man can have many merits, but there are still several potential disadvantages. For instance, an older man is less likely to tolerate changes to his life. Instead, the older man probably has an established and well-organized routine that has worked for him for years, and he doesn't want to alter it. Because older men can be set in their ways, you should think twice before dating one unless you are willing to do most of the adapting.

1. Men have had more lovers

Older men have had more wives, girlfriends or lovers than younger guys. This can make them quite wise when it comes to relationships. It can also leave them with a lot more emotional baggage than younger men. Hence an older man may have a bitter and biased point of view when it comes to women. For instance, he might think that all women are nagging shrews because his ex-wife never gave him a moment's peace.

2. Men often have children

Depending on the age gap between you and him, his children might even be grown up. If the older man you are dating his grown up kids, it can make things feel very awkward. This is especially true if your man's adult children take an instant dislike to you, which is something that often happens in such cases. Issues with adult step-children are a very common problem with age gap relationships. Even if your older man's children are still young, they can still cause problems. Are you ready to settle down with a man who comes complete with a family?

3. Man might not share all of your interests

A man might not share all of your interests, values, beliefs and opinions. Furthermore, he is less likely than a younger man to want to go out and party or bungee jump from a bridge at the weekend. Instead, he will probably want to enjoy cozy nights at home, attend dinner parties, or go out for romantic meals at restaurants. An older man's friends are more likely to share his interests than yours. If you want to go out and enjoy doing all the things that young people usually find fun, you had best avoid the older man. The older man isn't likely to be interested in these pursuits because he's already been there and done that.

4. Men will eventually grow old and feeble

If you date and then marry a man, you are going to have to deal with the fact that he will eventually grow old and feeble. This may mean that you eventually have to take care of him. It also means that he will very probably die long before you do. Are you prepared to care for your man when he can no longer look after himself? Are you willing to become a widow early in life? Thinking about death and infirmity may be disturbing, but these are questions you must ask yourself before getting involved with a man who is significantly older than you.

5. Prejudice from other people

If you get involved in a relationship with an older man, you will probably have to contend with prejudice from other people. Narrow minded individuals will assume that you are a gold digger who cuckolds her husband on a regular basis. They will also assume that your older man is some kind of sick pervert for dating a woman so much younger than he is. You may even have to deal with your own natural prejudices and misgivings. Your older husband will probably have more physical flaws than he did when he was younger. For instance, his bottom might not be as firm as that of a man in his early twenties, and he might have a bit of a paunch.

Can you look past these physical flaws? If such imperfections are likely to put you off, then you have no business being with a man who is significantly older than you.

Women Fitness Magazine

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3 Amber Flags About Women

There are many "red flags about women" articles floating around on the internet. This time though, I will address the amber flags - not good, but not absolute deal breakers either. These can go both ways, but are flags to keep in check, just in case.

Fashion

I was slightly confused for a few days when I suddenly started spotting women on the streets using MK bags. I laughed and thought to myself really, is Milton Keynes council making bags now? For those who do not know, Milton Keynes is a city in England and its post code starts with the letters MK. (and yes, I know what MK really stands for). These babies are expensive and, unless they were bought as counterfeits in a trip to the East side of the globe, they cost as much as 2-3 weeks rent in London. I am conscious that fashion plays a big role in a woman's life but I am a bit weary of women who succumb to trends like this. Why? They are followers - they blindly follow whatever trend is spat in their faces and they fail to realise they do not become trendy by doing so but rather common. It shows a need to look like other women, an unhealthy seek for acceptance and external validation insofar as wearing the item is needed in order to fit in. Secondly, because this shows a lack of financial control. I find hard to believe that every women I saw wearing such bags, for example, actually had the disposable income to buy them, or indeed the need to acquire such item. Truth be told, the distinction between needs and wants is sometimes heavily blurred by women, especially when it comes to acquiring a handbag or a new pair of shoes.

Technology

OMG, the latest iPhone is out and I still haven't got one? *runs to the phone shop, pays a substantial amount of money in advance and sign a 2 year contract with a mobile phone network, including millions of minutes, texts and data, which she will never need.* Unless you are an extremely busy person, who needs to conduct business on the move all the time or some technology geek, there is no valid reason to spend your latest salary on the latest gadget. It's all very nice, but do you really need the upgrade? Do you?

Drunken state

Sober truths are said in a drunken state. This holds true most of the time. If a woman behaves completely differently, shows slutty erratic behaviour, swears excessively, becomes something completely different than her sober self, then there is your flag. Everyone behaves more or less like a clown when drunk, some are happy clowns, some are sad, and some are angry clowns, but if the discrepancy is too great, maybe, just maybe, she is not who you think she is.

Brave New Man covers a wide range of subjects which are pertinent to the 21st century man.

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Rules of 6-Pack Dating

I am very goal-oriented, and I read my affirmations every morning. So, it was pretty easy for me to round up my perfect "6-pack." (This "round-up" story will be told in the future posts.) My only married friend (Mind you, none of my friends are married. In fact, they are mostly all SINGLE without steady boyfriends/girlfriends.) strongly recommended that I date 6 people all at the same time before I walk down the aisle.

Why six? Because even God rested on the 7th day, right?

I, on the other hand, don't recommend this 6-pack dating to just anyone since it is extremely time-consuming and physically/mentally exhausting. If you have a demanding full-time job, then you should downsize to a 2 to 3-pack situation. It takes a lot of energy to be quick with remembering things and/or acting like you accidentally forgot things in a very cute manner. However, trust me, the experience alone was worth the try even though the whole ordeal lasted no more than 2 months. You can't have dessert all the time, right? Here are some invaluable tips I came up with to ease the stress of the 6-pack dating.

• Sometimes hang up the phone in the middle of the conversation. It will make them think you have a bad cell connection at home. This way, you can always blame it on the bad connection for not answering the phone.


• Text a question that requires him to respond and wait until he texts back. Then call the next day and ask him if he got your first text at all? He will say he did, and even texted you back. Ah ha, he will get the idea that your phone sucks and doesn't receive all the texts (or his texts here). No one can keep in touch perfectly with all 6 guys. This gives you a way out when necessary. However, don't abuse this privilege!


• If you do not possess an eidetic memory as I do, or if you have a full-time job or something that takes up your memory bank, then you won't be able to remember every conversation you have with the guys. Get a notebook/diary and keep it around at all times. Write down important facts like his astrological signs, siblings, vegetarianism, blah, blah. Read the notes before seeing each guy so that you're refreshed on "who" is going on. He will feel like you really care about him. You always want to be remembered as the sweet girl who made him feel extra special.


• Never ever pay! Those are 3 nasty letters, PAY! This is one mistake I see girls/women make over and over again. WTF? First off, men should always ask you out first. Hence they pay. Do not mother them. We need to be taken care of, and that's the natural order. Who are you to fight God? If the guy really likes you, he will pay and ask you out again. Here's a little caveat: Do charm his pants off whenever possible, both figuratively and literally. As long as you're being safe, you can have as much fun as possible. Being considered a "slut" or promiscuous is so circa whatever's in the past. Passé! You don't keep that hideous sweater your grandma gave you when you're a kid. So why bother with the old ball and chain?

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